As you are already aware, the newest Harry Potter movie hit theaters this week and has continued the destructive business it started all those years ago. People have been planning weddings, social gatherings, charity functions, and their education around this event. The world shuts down when something Harry Potter opens up. I despise the whole Harry Potter franchise for what it is doing to America but that won't stop me from seeing the movie this Friday.
Harry Potter fans will argue that this is one of the best things which has ever happened to the world. It got the children reading books instead of watching TV all the time. They must believe that before the advent of Harry Potter children did not know how to read and these books have eradicated the illiteracy problem from the face of the earth. I would rather the children not read if this is what they are choosing. You could get more from an hour with Scooby Doo than you could get from a month of reading those books.
The movie is no different as far as quality but I have to see it. If I don't I will be ostracized from society. I will have nothing to say at the dinner table. My lady will find me repugnant and uncivilized. I won't understand the jokes and references which people are constantly making in everyday, unrelated conversation. Even if you are like me and want to boycott all things Harry Potter, you know that you'll find yourself on the outside looking in. Your family will disown you. You will be looked upon with more disgust than convicted terrorist.
But as we learn from history, the public's taste is always better than your own. That's why we have pop music and reality TV.
Your Band Wagon Servant,
Uncle Tom
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